After all, there's one thing we all have in common - we all believe we are excellent drivers. What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? I couldnt work out how to fasten my seatbelt. My wife and children are leaving me because I am obsessed with Formula One. 48. Dad jokes exist for numerous topics, including autosports, and here are some of the most cringe-worthy race car one-liners. By doing so it creates people with an unfair advantage when it comes to competition. A few laps later, the bartender says "Earnhardt Jr is up to 3rd", after which the dog again jumps up and runs around the barstool 3 times. The bartender says "WOW! Why do conservatives hate the NASCAR subreddit? Why do rednecks like to do it doggie style? It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. Q: What Does Brittany Spears And Dale Earnhardt Jr Have In Common? Let us know what you think! Do you have a favorite car joke? You should get a job at a transmission repair shop.Im sure youll get used to the early-morning shifts. Press J to jump to the feed. WebQ: What Does NASCAR Stand For? Imagine a nascar fan. Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work. Not so sure about that a lot of them have a checkered past. 98% of all Jeeps ever made are still on the road today. Bobby says, "No, the cord was fine, but what the hell is a "pinata?" Chastain Your Seat Belts 3. 54. Unfortunately, Jeff isn't able to catch him, and Bobby falls again, bounces and comes back up again. "I'm afraid not," explains The WonderBoy. The priest said he agreed and took the bottle, didn't drink at all, put the cap on, and handed it back to Special K. Why is Miss Piggy such a bad driver?Because all she does is hog the road. It reminds him that he never got to finish a race. This article was originally published on Dec. 6, 2019, A Mom's Hilarious Review Of Her Dad Watching Her Son Is Going Viral, A Man Went Viral For Refusing To Give Up His Spot On A Ride To A Crying Child. Thank you for taking the time to share your feedback with us! Why did the cop pull over the U-Haul truck? 30. Gordon asked. When he comes to, he says, "Boys, you saved a Three Time Winston Cup Champion. Which word has 6 letters, starts with an N and ends with an R and is related to a Race You name it, and You Got It!" Icy Bridge 28. Who can drive all their customers away and still make money?Taxi drivers. He told Kyle that the next time hes on the beach to put him a potato in his trunks and the ladies will gather round. "Let us go for a spin. What is the least favourite meal for drivers? A: Telling your parents that your Lesbian! I'm not a fan of NASCAR We will not publish or share your email address in any way. He is also a racing fan and interestingly, has been an honorary pace car driver for the Indianapolis 500. Why did the washing machine schedule a test drive?Because he wanted to go for a spin. Q: Why isn't NASCAR driver Jeremy Mayfield worried about reportedly testing positive for methamphetamines again? Here is one of the most popular clean race car jokes inspired by colourful supercar bed designs that children and adults love. Things ended up getting X rated, so I thought it better to just LEAF them alone. It even says in the bible. 4. Have I given you the tour of my estate yet? A truck carrying blackberries spilled on the highway. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. ._1QwShihKKlyRXyQSlqYaWW{height:16px;width:16px;vertical-align:bottom}._2X6EB3ZhEeXCh1eIVA64XM{margin-left:3px}._1jNPl3YUk6zbpLWdjaJT1r{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;display:inline-block;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;padding:0 4px}._1jNPl3YUk6zbpLWdjaJT1r._39BEcWjOlYi1QGcJil6-yl{padding:0}._2hSecp_zkPm_s5ddV2htoj{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;display:inline-block;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;margin-left:0;padding:0 4px}._2hSecp_zkPm_s5ddV2htoj._39BEcWjOlYi1QGcJil6-yl{padding:0}._1wzhGvvafQFOWAyA157okr{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;box-sizing:border-box;line-height:14px;padding:0 4px}._3BPVpMSn5b1vb1yTQuqCRH,._1wzhGvvafQFOWAyA157okr{display:inline-block;height:16px}._3BPVpMSn5b1vb1yTQuqCRH{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-body);border-radius:50%;margin-left:5px;text-align:center;width:16px}._2cvySYWkqJfynvXFOpNc5L{height:10px;width:10px}.aJrgrewN9C8x1Fusdx4hh{padding:2px 8px}._1wj6zoMi6hRP5YhJ8nXWXE{font-size:14px;padding:7px 12px}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y{border-radius:20px}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y:hover{opacity:.85}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y:active{transform:scale(.95)} Nascar pit crews have one very solid benefit A good retirement plan. 31. Whats the difference between Hitler and a Nascar driver? They're both filled with white trash. Jeff Burton went to work for the telephone company so he could finally get on the pole. Q: What is the worst thing about 5 Jeff Gordon Fans going over a cliff in a Monte Carlo? The bartender says "Earnhardts is in 25th". This time, he is bruised and bleeding. The image that comes to mind is probably that of a brutish, beer guzzling, loud mouth, hairy, unwashed, unshaven, redneck And her husband. The priest replied, "No.I think I'll just wait for the police." Kyle Busch replied, "I told him I was driving around with Jeff Gordon and I'd just killed the old goat." Why should Microsoft, Intel and Nvidia get into the motorsport business? It's lights out, and away they go! Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Conspiracy Theory? The room is silent; none of the other children volunteer. The buyer responds: "When I sat in Fiat 500, my knees covered my ears.". RELATED: The Most Awesome Race Car Toys And Tracks For The Kid Obsessed With Racing. Politicians should be required to dress like NASCAR drivers. NASCAR is one of the most popular car sports. Jeff asked, "Aren't you going to have any?" Lamborghini once decided to ditch the ICE entirely and focus on electric cars for foreseeable future. Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. Porsche will sell electric sports car specifically for environmentally conscious owners experiencing a midlife crisis. A: Banging On The Lid Of The Casket Trying To Get Out, 34. Because everytime I do good I find away to wreck it before I finish! Ambrose Before Hoes 13. Small Town If you enjoy it, don't let others try and take it away from you. A Baguetti Veyron. (Exception with Baku 2017). What happens to fans if they run behind a dragster? I wanted to buy a new electric car. Yeah. 35. What is a six letter race that starts with a N and ends with a R Nascar. Knock, knock! How would you rate the quality of the article? The third kid says, "I'd like a electric twin-turbo wheelchair with a HiFi stereo and Cruise Control." 5. Anyhows, it doesn't matter if you are driving a Model S, a 1990 Dodge Charger, or your partner mad, funny car jokes will surely tickle one's pickle, whichever the case is. Q: Why isnt NASCAR driver Jeremy Mayfield worried about reportedly testing positive for methamphetamines again? How many NASCAR fans does it take to change a tire? Whats the difference between a Fiat and a golf ball? He slips off a Icy bridge, hits his head, and falls into an icy river. But on a serious note, don't be a douche, chip in on that petrol, the liquid gold is expensive these days. What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? Imagine a nascar fan. Bobby jumps and bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the Jeff notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. Knock, knock! Matt Kenseth's car breaks down on the Interstate, so "9:12" eases over onto the shoulder. Knock, knock! 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They jump in and save him. because no-one else would be able to ketchup. A: Hollywood is calling and wants him to co-star in a sequel to Speed Racer. My sweetheart is always taking health food crazes too far. Because the lettuce is always a-head, while the tomato is always trying to ketch-up. Liberals who watch Rupal Drag Race cannot make fun of conservatives for liking Nascar. You should get a job at a transmission repair shop. A girl raises her hand. "That is what we would call a GREAT LOSS." Drivers Lounge A: Because it was interfering with Jeff Burtons ability of finish the race! NASCAR. What do you need to be able to drive in the outback?You need to show koala-fications. What do you call a speedster made of French bread? Apparently NASCAR fans didn't want to mix the races. Hey,what's a race thing and starts with n and ends in r I'm Matt Kenseth a NASCAR driver. Because would all go al-right, al-right, al-right. It has a top speed of 34, the electrics don't work, and the radio works but only plays the theme from "Hawaii Five-O" and you cant turn it off. ": 40 Hilarious Before-And-After Pictures, As Shared By These Women With A Sense Of Humor (New Pics), "He's A Douchebag": 50 People Share What Schoolmates-Turned-Celebrities Were Like Before Fame, 30 Informative And Fun Food Charts For Anyone Trying To Eat Smarter, 30 Of The Most Spine-Chilling Things Kids Have Ever Said, As Shared In This Viral Twitter Thread, "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight", 50 Times People Had A Beautiful Tattoo Idea And It Got Executed Perfectly, Guy Puts In His "Notice Of Immediate Resignation" After Boss Disregards Their Verbal Agreement, Warns Others To Always Write Things Down, AITA? Whats the difference between a presidential election and a nascar race? What does NASCAR stand for? That dog is amazing!! He sits down and asks how Dale Earnhardt Jr is doing. A: When he taps you on the shoulder and asks "Are we watching qualifying?" When you cant find a parking spot, you turn down the volume to see better. Q: How can you tell when Mark Martin is going to say something intelligent? The front row at a NASCAR race. Colin, who? Apparently NASCAR fans didnt want to mix the races. 8. A: Caution Flag Yellow What kind of motorbike does Santa ride?A Holly Davidson! Although racing requires ultimate seriousness and focus from all motorsport team members, including drivers, humour adds more flavour to the game. At first, the Focus wanted to Bolt, but after a while a Spark formed. They neeeeoooww. 1 of 94 We're in for a real treat this weekend -- racing at Iowa Speedway on Father's Day. Redneck: 'That's nascar ye got there.". -&y. Wanted: A man who has been stealing wheels from police cars. After discovering it's just a human traffic ring. I've seen a few youtubers try them out and they seem brutal. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. My 35-year boycott of Ferrari and Lamborghini is still going strong! ._1sDtEhccxFpHDn2RUhxmSq{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-flow:row nowrap;flex-flow:row nowrap}._1d4NeAxWOiy0JPz7aXRI64{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}.icon._3tMM22A0evCEmrIk-8z4zO{margin:-2px 8px 0 0} 5. 59. Saimonas has mainly worked as a freelance graphic designer, illustrator and finds joy in anything related to visual arts. Kyle Busch and Jeff Gordon were driving around a small country town when Kyle accidentally hit and killed a goat. He was in there for what seemed like hours. If a cars chasing you, youll definitely get tired. And her husband. I hear in New York City its hailing taxis!. Q: What do you call Michael Waltrip racing with his car tied to the back of Jeff Gordons? A: They Both Blow Rods Who can drive all their customers away and still make money?